“MY LIFE WITH RAY…..by Nona Ballard”

I was 2 years old when my mother bought the wooden high chair that Ray had used and as I grew mother would saw off the legs. How could anyone know that our paths would cross 13 years later when his dad began preaching at the Duncanville Church of Christ and Ray would invite me to his Senior play, our first date, I was a Freshman in High School and he was graduating in early in January. I was not supposed to begin dating until I was 16, but….this was the preacher’s son. I don’t remember the name of the play but I do remember that when he took me home that we sat out in the car (he stayed on his side I stayed on my side of the car) and we told tongue-twisters until 4:00 AM. Also, he shared with me his knowledge of how to work on a car — I was such a good listener. I was grateful when I went in to have a snoring parent because with each snore I took a footstep and it was years later before mother ever knew of that extended first date. As a side note….we never kissed until we were engaged 2 years later.

Ray had earned a scholarship to ACC by making the highest grade in the county on his 2 years of Bible for Credit that was offered for many years, so he was soon off to college. He had no car but whenever anyone was coming back to Dallas he would ride with them and we would have another date. Of course, we did correspond via snail mail and I still have every letter that he ever wrote to me. Even with a scholarship, ACC was too expensive for this frugal young man, so after one semester he switched to a local college. His chosen major was not to his liking and being placed on probation for poor grades made him decide to go to work rather than college so he was off to California to seek employment. Somewhere along the way he decided that we were too young to be getting serious so he ended the relationship, but not the memories.

Ray began to write to me from California after a period of time, after all I was becoming a mature young woman of 16 going on 17. Ray knew that it was inevitable that he was ripe to be drafted so he volunteered to be drafted and he was soon in the Army. Our letter writing continued and one day while he was in basic training at Fort Knox, KY, when I was 17 and a Junior in high school, I got a letter from Ray with that all important question, as only Ray could put it…..”If you feel the same way about me as I do about you, we will consider ourself engaged”??? Needless to say, I got the message and fired a letter back to him with a resounding “yes”. Then he wanted to know if I wanted an engagement ring?? Silly boy, of course I did. So he had his parents to send him a catalogue for him to make a selection, so the rings were purchased in Dallas and mailed to KY for his approval and then he mailed them on to me in Duncanville — I still wear those rings to this day. Mother picked up the package at the post office and brought them to me at school during lunch hour on a day that I was taking 6 weeks test — great for the concentration. My next test was Biology (I did not like this subject) and as I placed my left hand on the page, the ring seemed to fill the entire page — oh yes, I made my best grade on the test that day.

Ray had a 4 day pass go come home before heading for Korea and we had our first kiss somewhere along the way. All of the time that he was in Korea, I wrote him every day, he not as often but I do have every one of those letters. I finished high school while he was gone and got a job at Travelers Insurance — oh yes, there was a wedding to plan and only 20 months and 1 day in which to do it. This was my mothers big production so she pretty well took over the wedding planning, made my dress, cake etc. I had just turned 19 when Ray finally came home in September and we married November 2 — the day my life found a wonderful beginning and fulfillment. While dressing to go to the church, the zipper in my wedding dress gave way and mother used scores of little gold pins to hold me together. Along with the zipper, my mind went too, and I don’t remember anything until the cold air hit my face as we left the church as man and wife. I am not sure that Ray fared any better because neither of us heard that train whistle as it blew going through Duncanville only a block away until we played the wedding tape. Ray’s first duty, as a husband, was to undo all of ‘those little gold pins’ — he spent his life getting me out of things.

In January Ray changed his major and went back to college at Arlington State (now UTA) while I supported us. This was only a 2 year college but as he needed the thiird year, that year was added as was the fourth so he was among the first class to graduate from Arlington State and his name joined others on a plaque that once hung in the student union building. To help our finances he began preaching at Cold Springs and continued to do so until graduation. That 1949 Chevrolet that his parents had given us as a wedding gift had many miles run through the odometer. The good people of Cold Springs provided us with some good eating from their gardens.

The 1949 Chevy was stick shift and was ready for us when Ray came home from Korea. I was not privileged to drive while still at home so did not have my license. So before the wedding one evening as we pulled up to a stop light, Ray jumped out of the car and ran around to my side and I found myself behind the wheel. I managed to get us around the corner and stopped to bring the seat forward. While attempting to help, Ray was grasping the door post and when I slammed the door, his three middle fingers took he hit. I was so sorry but he never did that again. It took 2 attempts but I did get my license in that car.

The day after graduation he began a 31+ year tenure with Affiliated foods. We had a son, Kyle and 4 years later adopted our daughter, Cara and they gave us 7 precious grandchildren (4 girls and 3 boys). We ended up having 3 new houses, various RV’s that brought many years of enjoyment and have had a perfect marriage. We shared the same interest in teaching others about Christ from Bible classes in our home congregations, to Guyana, SA, Cuba and home Bible studies. Our latest venture was with the Sojourners by doing physical labor to enhance facilities where Bible teaching takes place.

The bumps in the road became minor because we worked together. We encouraged each other and I have done things that I never dreamed I could do because he encouraged me. I have been fond of saying that it takes both of us to make a whole and that sometimes it may only be three-quarters. My advice to young marrieds has been to not marry to ‘be loved, but to love’ and in so doing you will receive love. I lived with the knowledge that there was ‘nothing’ that Ray may do that I may not like that was more important to me than ‘he’ was because I was certain that I gave him many things that he had to overlook. I treasure the 54 1/2 years that we had together and will miss him so very much but will always treasure the memories.

Our life together was not that of a ‘fairy tale’ but was real and God-centered. What more could a girl ask for???

Obituary for Ray Ballard

Date of Birth: November 17, 1935

Place of Birth: Buffalo, TX

Date of Death: April 24, 2012

Place of Death: Baylor Medical Center at Grapevine in Grapevine, TX

Age: 76

Survivors: Nona Ballard (wife); Kyle Ballard (son); Cara Roberts (daughter) and husband, Rodney; 7 grandchildren; Lavora Gates (sister) and husband, Bryce.

“Influence of Pornography and Media on One’s Family” Bible Class

“What Does It Mean to Build an Intentional Family” AM Sermon

Family Ministry Book List

Minor Children’s Book List

1. “A Family with Issues: Does This Child Have a Chance?” – May 6, 2012 PM (Outline – A Family with Issues)
2. “A Son is Born: What is Your Child’s Potential?” – May 13, 2012 AM  (Outline – A Son is Born)
3. “Favoritism and Jealousy: Who’s on First?” – May 13, 2012 PM  (Outline – Favoritism and Jealousy)
4. Dreams: What are Your Hopes and Goals?
5. Slavery: Are You a Victim of Others’ Choices?
6.  Guilt: Why Do You Hold Onto It?
7.  Unintended Consequences: How Do Your Sins Affect Others?
8.  In Egypt, but not of Egypt: How Do You Serve God in a Pagan Culture?
9.  Temptation: It’s Coming.  It’s Here!  Are You Prepared?
10.  False Accusations: How Do You Handle Criticism?
11.  Waiting: How Do You Learn to Wait on God?
12.  Promotion and Power: Are the Last Really First?
13.  Repentance and Forgiveness: Do You Need to Repent, Forgive, or Both?
14.  Providence: How Does God Work All Things for Good?
15.  Future: Do You Know for Sure Where You are Headed?
16.  Many Colors: How Does Joseph – and How Do You – Reflect Jesus Christ?

Click HERE  to listen to the 2012 Audio files.